When I met my husband, he was at the time, struggling with a dark cloud of depression.
It was very difficult for me to understand and at times I felt very alone.
As time passed, I grew to care deeply for him irregardless of his struggle, and I prayed diligently for God to help guide me in the right direction.
Then, one day, a friend showed up out of no where, deciding to pop by..right when Seth was struggling the worst and I was feeling scared/desperate.(Indeed it was a God moment that she showed up right when I needed her the most)
As she sat with me, she shared her struggles also with the battle of depression/anxiety.
Having her words of comfort and also guidance helped me to understand what my husband was going through so much more.
It also began opening my world to what depression and anxiety truly is.
It isn't something you can just shake off and put up a smile.
Days when it's a struggle to just get out of bed, like a elephant is sitting on your chest, the heaviness is so bad.
For awhile, I thought it was just me that there was something wrong with.
It was my fault I couldn't make him happy..
I tried all I could..but as time grew on I realized only One could pull my husband out of this dark cloud.
For 10 years husband has been prescribed anxiety/depression medication..10 years. And it was prescribed to him when he was trying to get off of drugs..and the dr never stopped refilling his prescription.
Over so long of a period of time, he developed shaking,unable to focus good, restlessness,irritability, worse depression and even muscle jerks while he slept at night.
As of December and much prayer, we decided it was time to start tapering off.
Would I suggest a dr(who is supportive) to help assist you in this..most definitely.
We, unfortunately,are at a place where it isn't possible..
But God knew this and placed a vast array of people into my network to help support us as we started our journey.
You have to have that too.
If you can't have someone to lean on..you'll break.
I could write on and on about my experiences as a spouse of someone who has this disease, but for today..I have to keep it semi short.
We have been a little over a month so far of tapering off of bupropion and paxil.
A dark cloud begins for a week or so, but then a ray of sunshine begins to come out.
I sent out many many requests of prayer..and the more people prayed..the more miracles I saw.
A few days ago, my husband was at his darkest in his struggle with his bupropion withdrawal.
I had a doctor helping me online with supplements and support over this period...but when I sent out a vast request for prayers..a miracle started to happen.
My husband started smiling again and even laughing.
The love of my life started coming back to me.
For the first time in two week, he awoke with no feelings of irritability.
Is this answer to prayer..most definitely.
He barely shakes anymore, no longer jerks, and is able to focus like he wants to.
Are we done with this battle? I don't know..only God knows.
But I know prayer works.
God saw our desperate situation, heard the prayers..and has given a time of healing..of promise.
Prayer works. Faith works.
You must trust God that He can and will pull you through.
1 out of 4 people are diagnosed with depression. Is there a ministry out there for this..you bet.
This is a dark place we live in today and many many people need to know love, especially the love of Jesus.
So reach out and try to understand what they are going through instead of judging them of how they are acting.
I love my husband so very very much and will stand by him in this journey...
For any struggling as a spouse,friend,family,etc..I would highly HIGHLY suggest reading Neal Nedleys book on depression. He has a vast array of DVDs,work books,books,and so much more to help understand depression/anxiety.
His program has helped thousands of people come off of their medication and live normal lives. It has been such a tremendous help to us..also
he has many videos up on YouTube I watched also.
Most of all though..pray.